Emotional Support & Expectations


Always there for your circle, yet when you have a genuine crisis, does it seem like your support system disappears?

Many suffer as a result of family dynamics, job loss, illness, caregiving, addiction and even death of a loved one. These life transitions can feel unbearable and extremely challenging.

Often, salt is added to the wound as many report, they are always there for their loved ones yet when they need emotional support everyone disappears.

These situations can complicate the crisis. Devastated and stunned as we always thought a certain someone would be there. Thoughts can be all consuming as many feel let down, judged, and disappointed. You must be mindful of your audience. A wise person once said, “Expectations Are Dangerous”.

Expecting others to be there in the way you are, sets you up for additional heartache.

Those individuals may not have the same tool kit to offer support. They might have troubles within their own lives. They might be uncomfortable seeing you in a vulnerable situation. You might feel perplexed, dumbfounded, as all along, you assumed they thought and behaved just like you.

Plant fresh gardens of emotional support. Many do not understand what we need. If your circle is not there for you, it’s best to be proactive and find other means of support. It might be a caregiver or grief support group, maybe a new book club with likeminded individuals. Often we grow and evolve in different ways.

It can feel extremely upsetting as we long to feel close to those in our circle. For everything there is a season. Life is short, embrace those who are there for you in difficult times. They might not be the people you thought, but possibly a refreshing and pleasant surprise. God gives us what we need when we need it. Simply notice and place your thoughts on gratitude. How we choose to perceive a situation is often the precursor of our suffering.

Just Remember

You are in control of your own thoughts.

Focus on what is right instead of what is wrong.

Marla Ruhana